Eat My Words » Unfortunate Names

Not a good Valentine's Day gift: Fat Pig Chocolate

admin — Mon, 14 Feb 2011 09:14:00 +0000

Unless you want to break up with her, this is not a good gift…

Would you want to work in the "Harry Baals" building?

admin — Wed, 09 Feb 2011 06:58:08 +0000

A former Indiana mayor who won four terms in the 1930s and 1950s is proving less popular with modern-day city leaders, who say they probably won’t name a new government center for him because of the jokes his moniker could inspire.

Harry Baals is the runaway favorite in online voting to name the new building in Fort Wayne, about 120 miles northeast of Indianapolis. But Deputy Mayor Beth Malloy said that probably won’t be enough to put the name of the city’s longest-tenured mayor on the center.

The issue is pronunciation. The former mayor pronounced his last name “balls.”

Supporters said it’s unfair that the former mayor can’t be recognized simply because his name makes some people snicker. But opponents fear that naming the center after Baals would make Fort Wayne the target of late-night television jokes.

“We realize that while Harry Baals was a respected mayor, not everyone outside of Fort Wayne will know that,” Malloy said Tuesday in a statement to The Associated Press. “We wanted to pick something that would reflect our pride in our community beyond the boundaries of Fort Wayne.”

An online site taking suggestions for names showed more than 1,000 votes Tuesday for the Harry Baals Government Center. That’s more than three times the votes received by the closest contender.

What do you think? Would you scratch Harry Baals?

Announcing the worst brand name of 2010…

admin — Fri, 04 Feb 2011 18:12:54 +0000

Putting the “wow” in bad spelling and impossible pronunciation, is Shwowp, Eat My Words’ Head Scratcher of the Year Winner for the worst brand name of 2010.

It was a heated competition with other contenders including Retardex Toothpaste (need we say more), Morongo Casino (where ‘morons go’ to gamble?), and iSwipe (say it out loud). But after many sleepless nights, cupcake bribes and consulting with the show’s producers, the hands-down winner was Shwowp.

Shwoop (oops, Shwowp), is actually a cool service – it helps shwowppers get a grip on their online shwowpping history. (Something that we here at Eat My Words need to help manage our shoe shwowpping obsession.) We suspect this name was the result of a drunken Scrabble game.

TIP: Just because a domain name is available on GoDaddy for $9.95 does not mean that is what you should name your company.

Showop (oops, we did it again) is ridiculously hard to spell and pronounced differently by everyone we asked. Check out our Google search results when we tried to find it under “Shwoop”…
Did you mean: shoop
Did you mean: shop
Showing results for shooby doo wop
Showing results for shoo wop. Search instead for showowop
Showing results for shwowp. Search instead for showowp

Finally! After all that guesswork and brain wracking we were too exhausted to continue. This name not only makes our head spin, it severely violates the Eat My Words SMILE & SCRATCH name evaluation test:

SMILE - the 5 qualities of a powerful name
Simple – easy-to-understand – No
Meaningful – customers “get it” – No, they get a headache
Imagery – creates a mental picture – Not a good one
Legs – wordplay opportunities – No, total dead end
Emotional – entertains, engages, etc. – No, “enrages” is not an emotion you want to evoke, especially from Eat My Words

SCRATCH it off the list if it has any of these 7 deal-breakers
Spelling-challenged – Absolutely!
Copycat – similar to competitor’s names – Totally – ShamWow!
Random – disconnected from the brand – Uh…
Annoying – hidden meaning, forced – Forced like a train wreck
Tame – flat, uninspired, boring – We think so
Curse of Knowledge – only insiders get it – Does anybody get it?
Hard-to-pronounce – With spit-up in your mouth, yes

TIP: Every time you have to spell, pronounce or explain your name to someone, you are essentially apologizing for it, which weakens and devalues your brand.

As a gesture of goodwill, Shwowp will be awarded a pink and gold Head Scratcher of the Year trophy, from the nice people at Eat My Words. (We’re also happy to give them some free name consulting should they decide to shwowp for a new name.)

Special props go to Robin Wolaner our #1 Name Scout, for sending us this submission. Robin’s always on the hunt for Head Scratchers and is a frequent contributor to our Facebook fan page. She’s also responsible for submitting last year’s winner – Speecees – an unfortunately named baby clothing company.

TIP: your brand name should not rhyme with “feces.”

This year, Robin was awarded a Have a Nice Day bouquet of flowers (because her name always makes us smile) and a genuine Head Scratcher massager, which we just popped in the mail this morning. (Creepy guy not included.)

Please continue to send us bad names for our 2011 Head Scratcher contest. And if you’re naming a business and want to make sure your own brand name doesn’t appear here next year, go here to see if your name sucks.

Wet your whistle with Pee Cola

admin — Tue, 01 Feb 2011 22:37:01 +0000

Thankfully Pee Cola from Ghana is actually cola (and cola colored) and not a Mountain Dew knock off. Best served at room temperature.

Thirst quenching? No. Hilarious? Yes!

Homo Milk. "Every drop delicious."

admin — Mon, 31 Jan 2011 23:53:01 +0000

A Canadian product named Homo Milk is just WRONG. Equally disturbing is the suggestive photo of the innocent young boy pictured drinking it on the Island Farms website, especially with the provocative tagline, “Every drop delicious.” Are you serious, Canada?

This name makes me want to reach for the barf bag

admin — Tue, 25 Jan 2011 18:13:13 +0000

Advertised on the back of a headrest is “Gold Embryo Corn Oil.” I’m not sure which Chinese airline this was on, but I do know the next time I’m in Shanghai, I won’t eat anything fried. Thanks to Risa Dimacali for sending this in and to her husband who wisely took a photo of it, as surely no one here would believe such a product existed.

Vote for the worst brand name of the year in our catty Headscratcher Contest

admin — Tue, 26 Jan 2010 23:19:00 +0000

Vote for the worst brand name of 2009 in our third annual Headscratcher of the Year contest. Past winners include Xobni and Shryk. How can you tell if a name sucks? It’s hard to spell, pronounce, decipher, meaningless to the audience, void of emotion, a copycat, or just gives you the heebie jeebies. (See the Eat My Words SMILE & SCRATCH Test for more criteria.)

Vote as many times as you like, and please share this with your friends. The winner will be announced in early February and be awarded a hideously ugly Head Scratcher of the Year trophy, compliments of Eat My Words.

You would have to be really thirsty to drink this…

admin — Thu, 13 Aug 2009 15:24:00 +0000

A photo submitted from our pal Rich Binell of Get Rich Quick!

Marketing gurus re-name pollack to boost sales… and call it COLIN

admin — Tue, 07 Apr 2009 05:25:00 +0000

Thanks to Kitchen Sink fan Igal Gabbay for alerting us to the latest naming disaster from the nitwit Brits…

Marketing gurus re-name pollack to boost sales… and call it COLIN
from the salacious tabloid, The Daily Mail
By Sean Poulter
06th April 2009

When the marketing experts at Sainsbury’s sat down to the task of trying to boost sales of pollack, they had a brainwave.

‘Let’s give it a new name,’ they said.

Many months and meetings later, the name was chosen – Colin.

Colin (pronounced Col-an) is what the French, who actually can’t get enough of Britain’s pollack, call the fish once it has been cooked.

It is an interesting choice of name and one which the British shopper may struggle to come to terms with.

Sainsbury’s said the exercise is designed to make British consumers add pollack to their shopping list as an alternative to threatened species such as cod.

There is a feeling that the current name is as ugly as the bug-eyed fish itself, while it seems a number of shoppers are wary about asking for pollack.

Read the entire article here…

Brooklyn Restaurant’s Name Hits a Sour Note

admin — Sun, 05 Apr 2009 05:22:00 +0000

From the New York Times...
By KAREEM FAHIM
Published: April 3, 2009
To the list of lofty names that glamorize the city’s fried chicken stands, like Crown, Royal and Kennedy, one Brooklyn restaurant owner decided to add another: Obama.
From the restaurant’s perspective, the name change grew out of pride in the new president and a keen sense of commerce. From other perspectives, it was tone-deaf at best, and racist at worst. When the restaurant, Royal Fried Chicken on Rutland Road in Brownsville, changed its name last week to Obama Fried Chicken, the reaction was swift.
“Community leaders came. They told us we have to change the name,” said Mohammad Jabbar, 33, the manager. “They said if you don’t change it they will take action.”
It was the latest outbreak of commercial enthusiasm for President Obama and his family. An Illinois company tried to sell dolls that looked like the president’s daughters, and a Brooklyn brewery, Sixpoint Craft Ales, named a beer Hop Obama in honor of the community organizer in chief.
A few minutes’ drive from Obama Fried Chicken, Obama Beauty Supply opened its doors several months ago. Its owner, Mohammed Seraji, said he was inspired by his children’s enthusiasm for the president, along with Mr. Obama’s popularity in the neighborhood. A Michelle Obama wig he sells, for $49.99, is emerging as a popular item.
A White House spokesman, Ben LaBolt, said in an e-mail message, “The White House has a longstanding policy of disapproving uses of the president’s name and likeness for commercial purposes.”
At the restaurant, Mr. Jabbar, who said he had been a lawyer and university instructor in his native Bangladesh before moving here in January, has, apart from serving food, become Obama Fried Chicken’s spokesman. The owner, he said, did not wish to speak to reporters.
Explaining the decision to rename the restaurant, Mr. Jabbar said that not only was the owner fond of President Obama but that the entire neighborhood also “loved” him.
“From this love, everything is happening,” Mr. Jabbar said, weary from all the attention.
There were support and derision for the unnamed owner along Rutland Road, where most every store hangs a picture of the president, and where, on a rainy Friday, passers-by took cellphone pictures of the rebranded fried chicken stand.
Chantel Harewood, 18, a college student who grew up in the neighborhood, ordered food from Mr. Jabbar and said she liked the new name. “Why not? It’s history,” she said. “All these stereotypes. People got to relax.”
However, Mr. Jabbar said that the restaurant was bowing to the pressure, and that it would be renamed Popular Fried Chicken by the weekend. Ms. Harewood did not think much of the new name. “That’s so blah, predictable, typical,” she said. The current name, she added, gave her “pride.”
In the Au Monde Chic barbershop, where Mr. Obama’s portrait hung on a back wall, Alnord Benoit cut a customer’s hair and called the name change “disrespectful.”
“Did he get permission from Obama?” Mr. Benoit asked.
In a nearby computer store, the manager, Earl Dennis, jokingly said he should rename his place Obama’s Computer Store. “It’s publicity,” Mr. Dennis said. Of the chicken restaurant, he said, “I’m not eating there.”
Competition might have played some role in the new name. Crown Fried Chicken is across the street, owned by Osman Mohibi, 47, an Afghan immigrant. He keeps pictures of Mr. Obama and Vice President Joseph R. Biden Jr. taped to the plexiglass divider by the cash register.
Mr. Mohibi said his competitor’s misstep was winning new customers for Crown Fried Chicken. “He used the name,” Mr. Mohibi said of the owner. “He used black people.”
Kevin McCall, one of the community organizers who confronted Obama Fried Chicken’s owner, said he received calls from residents disturbed by the sign, and quickly contacted the owner to tell him it was “very offensive to African-Americans.”
The owner told him it would be taken down the next day, Mr. McCall said. When it was not, he contacted the owner again. “I said we would be out there having a rally,” Mr. McCall said.
City Councilman Charles Barron, who was also involved in the effort to change the name, said it was possible that the owner was simply trying to exploit the president’s name. “Fried chicken, watermelon and minstrels are part of the racist stereotyping of black people in America,” he said. “It’s outrageous. You have to be sensitive and knowledgeable.”
At the store on Friday afternoon, Mr. Jabbar served ice cream to teenagers and chicken wings to regulars. He said he did not really understand the pressure to bring down the sign, since everyone who came in the store seemed to like the idea. And he was concerned about what would happen if the community advocates returned.
“I’m new to this country,” he said. “I don’t really know what they could do.”